In the panorama of life going on around us we notice what
helps us see ourselves, search out what’s relevant to where we’re going and
affirm our sense of the beautiful and ugly. The choices we make regarding where
we look are a window on deeper motives and can expand self-awareness. We may or
may not get the point. On a psychological level, the thing the eye is scanning
for is something that will clarify things about the self that need to be seen.
Marcel Proust and Willa Cather are just two of the many writers long before
modern psychology to have pointed out the human tendency to criticize our own
faults in others. It’s not just on a personal level. It’s easily seen at every
level of human interaction. This came to mind today listening to a man on the
radio demonizing North Korea for its extensive prison system. Since the US is
known world wide for the growing private prison system housing a higher
percentage of the population than any other country, his statement was an
excellent example of projection regarding our own national pathology. There are
lots of things he might have criticized North Korea for but the one he chose
was the one he recognized from the inside. And since he didn’t get the point,
what could be changed doesn’t. He talks about extensive prisons as a problem to
be solved, not thinking to turn that energy to the problem in his own sphere.
Our society is too punitive. Rather than celebrate positive qualities we limit
behavior with the threat of punishment. We’ve become more focused on obedience
than justice. Anthropologist Jean Liedhoff observed
that the Yequana people of Venezuela had no word for “disobedience”. They
looked at children as children and didn’t get into a power struggle making them
into little adults. The children don’t hurt others because adults don’t.
If kids are bullying others
there’s a good chance they are being bullied at home, whether or not the
parents realize it. They’re just imitating the behavior of the adults they see
like their parents did before them. Teasing shades into ridicule then into
humiliation, which is institutionalized by the prison system where brutality is
common, a national symbol of the mandate to obey enough laws to make everyone a
lawbreaker. And everyone is immersed in a culture where ridicule is
entertainment. Too much damage has been done by dominant cultures
forcing their worldview on people with entirely different life experience. It
happens at every level of society. It’s time for us to transcend our national
ego and learn from all that’s good in the world. The hyperconcern for safety
only cultivates fear and distrust of others, a population of isolated
individuals cowering in their houses with only their screens for safety. We
should start to notice and question the coercive systems that disrespect the
variety of individuals by labeling and diagnosing from childhood, when a world
of talents could flourish in each one.
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